Tips for a COVID Thanksgiving

By Kerrie Beene, CFP®

Happy Thanksgiving Week! It is a happy and sad time all wrapped up in one turkey.

We all have things to be thankful for while at the same time most of us are directly or indirectly affected by COVID. In this unfortunate time, 2020 Thanksgiving will not be the same for most. For me personally, we have decided to take precaution and cancel our normal gathering with my grandma. It was a hard decision but a few of the family members will be visiting her to keep her mental health in the forefront. While this is not ideal, keeping both our mental and physical health in good condition is the most important thing at this time. This situation will be the case for many, here at Rooted Planning Group we put together a list of things we can all do to stay mentally healthy during our COVID Thanksgiving.

1) Respect and Acknowledge your Feelings

This may sound corny, however, sometimes being able to recognize how we feel is the most important step. Not allowing ourselves to be trapped in our emotions will allow us to be more in control of our response to these emotions. Most people avoid emotions because they are uncomfortable. This is counterproductive and only creates a cycle of internal turmoil. Psychology Today lists the following steps to identify our feelings:

• Take your emotional temperature

• Identify your Stressors

• Notice if you start judging what you feel

• Speak about your feelings

• Let go of the fear

2) Reach out to Loved Ones

This is such an easy thing to do but too often does not happen. Reach out to family and friends that you are not able to spend time with. The small things can mean so much to some, especially those who live alone. Below are a few creative ways to make your loved ones feel special:

• Call and spend quality time on the phone with them or facetime them

• Mail them a card or care package

• Put together a video for them

• Send them flowers

• Deliver a meal (COVID safe of course)

• Play a game over Zoom

3) Feed your Mind

Being mindful of what we eat and how it will affect our emotions is very important. We would never recommending taking away the sweets, instead we will recommend some healthy food to incorporate to boost your mood.

• Turkey - contains tryptophan and is a mood booster

• Spices - get to seasoning. Spices such as cinnamon, will lift those spirits.

• Leafy Greens - these have mood and energy-boosting vitamins and minerals, such as folate, which regulates the production of serotonin

• Color up your plate - eat a variety of fruits and veggies for all different types of health benefits

4) Keep Active

Staying active is hard to do during the holidays, especially during COVID. Spend time relaxing and unwinding, however, block off a few hours to get in some physical activity. You can always go for a brisk walk, do a short workout, or find a project to complete around the house that you have been putting off. Regardless of your activity, the important thing is not to be a couch potato and let yourself feel sluggish. When our bodies feel this way, it leads to our minds feeling this way.

5) Give Thanks!

This one is easy to say but remember to actually do it. This can be paired up with reaching out to a loved one. Thank someone special in your life. Make a phone call or video for someone special thanking them for being them and being part of your life.

We hope this article is helpful during the COVID pandemic and from everyone here at Rooted Planning Group, Happy Thanksgiving!

Long Distance Caregiving

By: Rachel Poe

Some caregiving situations require the services of a long distance caregiver. According to the National Institute of Aging, a long distance caregiver is someone that lives an hour or more away from a person who needs aid. 

What are some of the roles of a long distance caregiver? Depending on the relationship, some duties may include home care, money management, medical correspondence with professionals, legal paperwork, medicinal disbursement, emotional support, family informant, etc. 

Having recently been the daughter of a long distance caregiver, I received some recommendations and advice for anyone that may be starting or struggling with the process of long distance support. These can be used by both long distance and nearby caregivers!

1. Learn the health issues that you are caring for. While medical professionals have been well trained, it is important to do your fair share of research to understand emergency situations, possible side effects, signs of medical progressions, and terminology so you can articulate to someone about their needs. Organizations like the Red Cross (and others) offer classes that may be able to help educate on some care procedures, first aid, emergency actions, or health diagnosis information.

2. Gain knowledge or access to personal accounts. While this may depend on your relation or position with this person, it is critical to gather an idea of their estate preparation, lists of bills and subscriptions, set up dual authorization on accounts, and ensure their accounts remain in good standing. 

   • For example, if you are the caregiver to someone who can no longer drive, this should be a flag to revisit insurances, car payments, radio or toll subscriptions, etc. 

3. Create a contact list! This is important for both yourself and the individual you are assisting. Keeping a proper record in phones, on the fridge, on the door, etc. can be a time and stress saver if a specific person or company is needed. Likewise, keep a calendar specific to your person’s schedule! This can include appointments, visiting days, deliveries, due dates, payments, medicinal reminders, etc. 

4. Because caregiving may be required from out of state, it is a good idea to get to know the community, neighbors, doctors, etc. within the area of your person. Many older individuals remain in their location due to having an emotional attachment or living in the same house for years. Identify those that interact with your relative on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. Again, get and share contact information, ask them to glance at the lawn, see if the car has moved, lights are changing in the house, etc. 

5. In addition to #4 - find ways to be present even though you are not physically present with a person. Ways to do this include connecting them with family members and close friends through basic social media. Invest in something like a GrandPad or IPad that allows simple communication and keeps them involved in information and with family.

   • I have personal experience with a GrandPad and they are a great tool for keeping communication simple, easy, and efficient. 

6. Set up a visiting schedule with your person; put in on their calendar. This not only gives them reliability and a schedule, but also gives them something to look forward to. In addition, create time blocks on your calendar to call them throughout the periods that you are not visiting. 

   • For example - if you visit them monthly for a week at a time, use those other three weeks in the month to call “x times” a week to check in. 

7. Take advantage of services! Do not feel like you have to do it ALL! Take a look at your budget and the budget of whom you are caring for. Do they have any recurring services in place that can help? Lawn? Cleaning? Pet Walker? Is there an opportunity for pre-made meal delivery? Discuss these things! This can also go hand in hand to your community outreach in #4. Delegating or hiring out those monthly duties listed can not only be a time saver, but will also allow you to spend quality time for the period you are visiting. 

   • Resources: (This is not an all encompassing list, but merely some ideas to get you thinking of some services near you!)

     1. Hello Fresh - food delivery

     2. Home Chef - food delivery

     3. Schwans - food delivery

     4. Rover.com - pet walkers

     5. Angie’s List - repairs, maintenance, lawn

     6. Care.com - cleaning, general care, errands

While every caregiving situation is unique, it is important to grasp that you are not alone. Hopefully some of these tips have resonated with you; feel free to reach out to us if there are additional recommendations we can add. Above all, seek out your family, community, government, and local resources to see how you and your loved ones can increase support for your needs.